Why I sleep late? May 4, 2008

My usual routines includes sleeping late. Recently, Apart from some reasons which I knew, I found one more cause which would have made me sleep late although subconsciously. The reason is that when I lay on my bed and try to sleep. I leave my mind to relax and that's when it starts wandering in the overcrowded empty space.

It feels like there is some hollow space filled with a lot of dreams and aspirations. Every night either I revisit one of that old aspiration or I create a new one. While lying in the bed just before sleep I think of doing things which I want to do; of things which I have to do; of things that I can't do; and of things that I couldn't do.

Sometimes I plan really big things, sometimes small. But there are mere few which I have brought into action. When I think about the reasons for it I find probably its because I am more of a thinker than a doer. And maybe because as once said by one of my close friend that "My entropy is high". I usually cant stand with one thing for too long (it feels like I am wasting my time and proceeding in the wrong direction so I chose another and finally dissatisfaction). Another reason maybe is I want to do a lot of things and all I have is such a small life with even less time for myself and even lesser time to work on one of them with full devotion and then I shall not forget to mention the wide range of moods that I have. So a match of a mood to a todo action is even lesser. For example right now I am in an introspective mood with a touch of distressing thoughts.

I don't do much physical work in my daily routine and therefore getting tired is unusual. All that feel tired in my body are my eyes and my hands after clicking the mouse and hitting the keyboard all day long. So falling to bed and sleeping in an instant is a privilege which I don't have. So to avoid long session of distressing thoughts and rolling restlessly on the bed and then thinking of writing a blog about it and finally getting frustrated over the whole stupid thing. I sleep late by keeping myself engaged in hitting the keyboard and clicking the mouse.

Don't know how long this is going to last. I think there are many others wondering the same for themselves.